I find it amusing that everytime I write a depressing post, I try to follow it up with fluff. When am I ever going to get it into my head that this is MY blog?
Onto the fluff:
I did the Princess 101 here, and have received some registrations for the second level course. Below is the course content. (Hi! Guess who works in education now!?) The quality of your comment is worth 100% of your grade. Whomever receives the highest grade will win a prize.
1. Fave junk food? Toss up between plain M & M's, caramel Haagen Dazs and chocolate almonds. The presentation of any will result in immediate forgiveness for almost any transgression.
2. Obsession: gift wrap, ribbon, bows, gift tags, cards etc. I could open up a shop. I didn't even use each kind of paper last Christmas- and I give a lot of gifts. Any local people want me to wrap for them this December? It will be art, I promise. For payment- see above.
3. Fave authors? Jane Austen. Guy Gavriel Kay. Although I do have my guilty pleasures: Dan Brown, Dean Koontz, and the Twilight books.
4. I have seasonal allergies that are trying to kill me. I've been back from Florida less than 4 days and I feel like crap again. I love spring to bits, but winter is the only season when I feel OK more days than not. I haven't been sick in almost 5 months, and now I could spend the day in bed.
5. I hate winter for every other reason except the above. And Manitoba? Is cold. And icy. And snowy. I don't enjoy winter sports, so skating, skiing, snowshoeing? Not an incentive.
6. My other blog? The one I started when I began my social "experiment" has gotten me free stuff, requests from students writing theses, and a stupid number of hits (1000 in one day? I thought for sure it was an error. Turns out I was promoted for one of my posts on one of those "blog roundup" sites). Sex sells people. Seriously.
7. If you love me, you will: a) buy me daffodils. b) watch cheesy horror movies with me. c) not make fun of me for being in bed by 10:00 every night.
8. I love giving gifts. Possibly because it gives me an excuse to wrap. Birthdays? Baby? Housewarming? Hostess? I'm wrapping up something for you...I do get concerned that people think it's either a bit creepy, or that I'm trying to buy their affections.
9. I scrapbook and journal and blog and one of my hobbies is geneaology. I sometimes feel like I have an over-developed sense of nostalgia and sentimentality. I find it physically painful to throw away cards that people have given me. Like they're immediately going to somehow sense it and have their feelings hurt.
10. I have two tattoos. I don't plan on getting any more. But then again, I didn't plan on ever having more than one either. I've noticed that it's mostly men who are opposed to tattoos. I find it odd. I suspect it's because they have a fear of commitment.
Registrations will be accepted next semester for 301.
Tuesday, April 28, 2009
Monday, April 27, 2009
I always thought that eccentricity was something that happened when you got old- but apparently it can strike at any age. Although perhaps "eccentric" isn't really the word I'm looking for. It might be "hermit-like" or even "reclusive." Or even worse "intolerant."
It seems that some people really need to be constantly exposed to people in order to get along with them. The more certain people spend time alone, they become increasingly impatient with the foibles of others. It's as if they've forgotten how to co-exist with humanity.
Freud wrote a book about the creation of "civilizations." I don't remember all of it but it seems to me that it was very profound. It had to do with the realization that man had that to live alone would create selfishness and chaos. (I think it also had to do with the sons murdering the fathers in order to have control over the women - but that's just an amusing detail).
You see people who are alone too much DO become selfish. And reclusive. And intolerant. Anything done in extreme isn't healthy. So when one works alone, lives alone, spends a lot of their spare time alone...well, that person might consider themselves admirably independent but in actual fact, they are nurturing a dangerous trait. A trait that leads to solitude, loneliness and resentfulness.
This is something that I thought a lot about while on my family vacay last week. During all the times I would wander off...alone. When I was on the shuttle going back to the hotel craving some "me time." While I was waiting for a movie to start after I lunched with Britt and Hilly rather than going back to the hotel where my family would eventually appear. (Loved Downtown Disney btw- movie theatres, shopping, restaurants etc etc).
I could easily dismiss this behaviour as the pain that anyone would go through when finding themselves thrust into a group of 11 other people for 7 days. In fact I could spin this so it's perfectly understandable. I mean after a few days, I stopped hating the sound of everyone's voices. I stopped trying so hard to get my brother to go off with the step family.
But that's just a detail. I like being alone. For the most part, I've worked either alone, or with one other person my whole career. My last job? I didn't mind it when my boss was on leave- though it meant more work for me. This job? I can go an entire day without having the need to exchange words with anyone around me. And frequently I don't.
This past weekend? I got back from my trip on Friday at midnight. I didn't call anyone on Saturday or Sunday. And not all the laundry, unpacking and finishing up Flat Jess projects in the world can really justify that. I had calls to return. I had people I could visit. But I chose not to.
My birthday a couple of weeks ago? I didn't plan anything. I had friends call me and offer to take me out/come over/feed me...but instead I chose to stay home - with the exception of an hour out to have a drink with My Dear Anon.
It's becoming increasingly apparent that this "independence" thing is blossoming into something worse than that. I find myself simultaneously losing patience with everyone around me, and feeling unworthy to be in their presence. The longer I go being single, gaining weight, doing nothing but work - the more I feel like I don't deserve better. So I start to retreat into my shell. And the thought of reaching out to people just seems so hard sometimes.
So yeah, I'm thinking I can go two ways with this: either start to make a massive effort into being with people or just stop trying altogether. People have lives. They'd give up on me after a while. Cause I can see where this is heading - and the more I avoid humanity, the harder it's going to be each time I have no choice but to be a part of it...
Posted by Princess of the Universe at 12:36 pm
Saturday, April 25, 2009
I could totally write the longest re-cap post ever about my week in Disney World, but I suspect that all of you would be hitting "mark as read" within the first paragraph, so I'll spare you. How about a few highlights instead (and then we'll never speak of it again).
* Sunscreen? For the sun. And the sun? A LOT more potent down there. And guess what? You have to put it on more than once a day. And no you can't stop wearing it once you've already been burnt, cause the logic of "well I already got being burnt over with on Day ONE" isn't logical. The sun? Still there. Yes, it can get worse.
*Yes, the word "magical" does get old after the first day. But remember you're with children and don't be so cranky about it. It's part of the marketing plan, deal with it.
* Just cause you're a loser and would cheerfully go on the "It's a Small World" ride 20 times doesn't mean everyone else wants to. Don't pout.
* Britt and Hilly? Lovely and warm and gorgeous. You knew this about them. So when you send texts to people saying "what if they hate me?" Expect to get responses like: "well they just twittered where they're meeting you, so at least you know they won't be murdering you." (Thanks Becky!) **And Hilly? While perfectly sweet and kind in person, assures me that if I knew her better I would see the full-on snark (Can't wait until next time!) Britt? A rock star with asking questions to make people comfortable, and genuinely does like working with Adam. (In case you were wondering)
*Roller-coasters? Not your thing. At all. Like ever. Shocking what a baby suck you are. You went on Space Mountain and loved it when you were 17. How could you have to close your eyes for half the ride this time??? And for the record? Closing your eyes in a pitch black roller coaster? Not so helpful. Like at all. Ever.
*Must write a letter to Disney people. Do they actually train animals to just wander around the resort? That's taking idyllic to a whole new level. The number and variety of tame-ish birds that walked right up to your door is astonishing.
* The environment in Florida overall? Perfect. And though you may feel slightly traitorous to Manitoba for saying this - it's true. Allergy attacks? Non-existent. Sitting outside? Pleasant. Breezes. NO mosquitoes. Unheard of in this province.*When you're exhausted after one extended plane ride and have less than an hour to get to the appropriate gate and leave for your connecting flight? Maybe reconsider after wolfing down Mcdonald's in 2 minutes. Your last flight? Scary turbulent? Remember the roller coaster revelation? Some of us don't have the strongest stomach. This may result in you alternatingly thanking God all through the next flight that Winnipeg and Minneapolis are only an hour apart and cursing your stomach for not just throwing up and getting it over with already. Longest. 59 minutes. Ever.
* One week with only 10 minutes to check the internet once was bearable. But marginally. Must purchase plaptop.
* Outlet malls? Lovely for a very brief time. And only when they have a Skechers store. Too bad it's -3 here. Not quite sandals weather yet. Soon I'll get to show off my latest purchase.
Thanks so much to my guest bloggers for holding down the fort while I was away. I loved ALL your posts.
Tuesday, April 21, 2009
Faithful subjects of the Princess,
The role of Your Princess will be shabbily substituted by me, Faiqa from Native-Born.
I’m something of a lurker on this blog, so regular readers are wondering... what is a Faiqa?
A Faiqa is an awesome pregnant woman who lives in Florida and blew the chance to meet our lovely princess because I was busy lounging on a beach near Tampa Bay.
Wait. Is that really your name?
It really is. It's pronounced Fie-Kah. Say it with me, Fie. Kah.
But, I digress.
Without further ado, fellow royal subjects, I present to you... a guest post. By Faiqa.
Really? That's really your name?
Shut. Up. We've covered this, haven't we?
When the Princess is at Disney and you’ve had to watch Sleeping Beauty 252,789 times in the past week, you, too, will arrive at the inevitable conclusion that you must do your guest post on Disney Princesses.
Get it? Disney? Princess? See. Inevitable.
And bear in mind that as our dear princess wanders aimlessly through the concrete desert of the Magic Kingdom paying $16.00 for three sips of water and a french fry, that she, too, is at this moment, a Disney Princess.
Because with Disney?
Resistance is futile.
- Princesses should wise up and understand that their stepmothers might actually be nice if maybe you complimented them once in a while, or at the very least, noticed that they were upset. Or, sheesh, you could just ask. (Snow White)
- Princesses should not accept gifts from strangers. Especially if the gifts are apples. Everyone knows that the only gift you’re supposed to accept from strangers are diamonds. Or European cars. (Snow White)
- Princes like girls who play hard to get. (All)
- A princess could get a job to buy a dress, but, really, she should cry until a fairy just gives her one. With shoes. And a car. (Cinderella)
- No matter how much you can't stand that witch, just invite her to the party. Better to grin and bear her crap for a couple of hours than have to endure her shenanigans for the next thousand years. (Sleeping Beauty)
- Being rich doesn’t mean you’re happy. And? Poor boys are easier to boss around than princes. (Jasmine)
- A little bit of midriff will go a long way as far as getting your man in the Middle East. (Jasmine)
- And I quote, "Being an adult equals work, in every sense of the word." (Princess of the Universe)
- Whatever life you're leading, it's your life. Just live it. And own it. Happily. (Princess of the Universe)
So. As I see it, it's our very own Princess of the Universe, for the win!!
She is so much more... more than those other silly princesses who, granted, have the severe disadvantage of being imaginary. And of being created by a misogynist machine that condemns them to play out the sad little fantasies of repressed old men.
Best. Disney. Princess. Ever.
That really is my name.
Oh. My. God.
Posted by Faiqa at 8:30 pm
Monday, April 20, 2009
Posted by AmyTree at 4:37 am
Friday, April 17, 2009
Good day all,
Nat here. I'm pinch hitting for Princess who is off having fun in the sun, and having blogger lunches, while her family wonder if she's hooking up with serial killers. I know, I get that too. The Internet is all porn and people looking to lure you to your death. They know they heard from a friend who heard it from a friend (who heard from another you'd been messing around?) that the Internet is a really dangerous place.
But we know that's not true -- the Internet is all about information. Important information, things it is critical for us all to know, massive amounts of facts right there at my finger tips.
For instance, on a lonely night last November, I stumbled upon Supernatural. I call it horror light, about two guys fighting evil of the demonic kind. But in order to gain a broader appreciation of the show, I needed to do a bit research on the story arc and the mythology. Just to get the story to that point, you understand. Because, you see it's all about fighting evil and I can totally get behind that. Not only did the Internet provide me with back episode, it also provided me with important information. For instance:
Here, you see Jensen Ackles who plays Dean Winchester sitting and looking at knowingly... to the untrained observer, he might also be described as the kind of man who could do my bidding. But I know here, he is looking and thinking about demons ... looking is VERY important to the plot. Here is making a plan or just sitting, sitting is also important for...
... muscle, I mean character development. This is from Episode about thing that eats people, the story arc in this episode should have called for Jensen to take his shirt off. But it's taken a lot of research to come to this conclusion. It's not for the weak. (Speaking of arcs, I also learned that there are not longer storylines on television shows, we now refer to them as arcs.)
Other information, just to get up to speed, I learned that the car in Supernatural is a 1967 Chevy Impala (and that at one point there were five of them). And that in one episode, you get to see Jensen's butt in the back seat. Unfortunately, he's doing some skinny anti-demon. But it really shows off the car in an interesting way. I'm about cars. (I drive a red Honda Civic. I'm not sure what year -- but it's got an iPod jack.) Luckily, the correct decision was made that Jensen had to be a little more than toplesss...
... I'm sure Princess would back me up this one too. Do you remember that season of Angel where he kept having dream sequences by the pool without his shirt on? I think Supernatural needs to explore some sort of half naked story line. I think I'm going to write to the producers right now.
Posted by Nat at 7:00 am
Wednesday, April 15, 2009
For once, I can look at my life and think it's good without having to convince myself.
Even when in the midst of my depressiveness, I know that there's really nothing wrong and I don't actually have anything to complain about. So while I'm in this mood (sure to be temporary) I am going to make a list. Here are the reasons (some of them anyhow) that my life, as of this exact moment is fab:
1. Free trip to Florida for a week as of this Friday (without internet access *gasp*).
2. 3 fabulous guest posters in this coming week: AmyTree, Faiqa & Nat
3. New manicure and pedicure in honour of said trip- pedi perhaps a bit on the trashy/overtly pink side - but who cares, it's just polish!
4. Not so much on my to do list at either work or home that I can't handle it before I leave.
5. Although I live next to a river, my home did not flood.
6. I went to work in summer shoes without socks today! And just a little jacket. Spring!
7. The meeting that I had to chair in my boss's absence today ended early, and I didn't make a total idiot of myself!
8. I have not been attacked with a hatchet lately.
9. I have a mystery package to pick up from the UPS depot tomorrow - surprise for me!
10. I managed to write a list of 10 fabulous things!
What makes YOUR life fabulous right now?
Saturday, April 11, 2009
Scene: At Princess's brother's house on Good Friday afternoon.
Princess's brother: Hey look at all the women who wrote to me on the "Are YOU interested" app on Facebook!
P: Uh huh. Oh hey! Look at her- she's hot, date her...
P's brother: so who are these people you're abandoning me at Disney to meet next weekend?
P: Britt and Hilly - you'll be fine. Our family is very nice you know. I've examined them very closesly since Dad married our stepmom 15 years ago. I think they're safe.
P: (logging into Twitter) *Sigh* "There's the boy of my dreams...there's my person..."
P's brother: what do the people you're meeting look like? Can I see them? Are they cute?
P: No. You can't see them. Go ask out the low cut top chick from the facebook app and leave my people alone.
Scene: Easter/Birthday dinner on Good Friday evening - the Princess and her family. Most of the talk is around the upcoming trip to Disney World next week.
Princess's stepmom: Who can name all the seven dwarfs? (Looking hopefully at the grandkids)
P: Happysleepysneezygrumpydopeybashfuldoc! *gasp for air looking proud of herself*
P's stepmom: Thanks Princess. Glad to see that you know them all. That was kind of directed to the kids.
P: (muttering to self) I bet they couldn't name them all that fast.
P's stepmom: Here open a present.
P: My birthday isn't until Sunday.
P's sm: Open it anyhow and shut up. (Looking at kids again) Now, who can name all seven dwarfs?
(This didn't really happen- but trust me, had she asked the question- it totally would have played out in the exact same way)
P's sm: OK, so some of us are going to "Fantasmic" and some aren't. We need to decide which night we're doing that.
P (in her head): "Fantasmic" sounds a lot like "Orgasmic." There's no way that can be a coincidence. Is this like that whole Urban legend about the castles in "the Little Mermaid" being phalluses, and the flower petals around Nala in "The Lion King" spelling out "sex"? This isn't going to end up being all awkward like the time I went to the "Rocky Horror Picture Show" with the parents is it? Cause that was just torture...
P (aloud): Ok, well I'm meeting some people on Sunday, so can we do this a different night? I don't know the time or anything yet.
P's step-sister: Yeah, who are these people you're meeting?
Other stepsister: Are you meeting a boy there?
P: No, I'm meeting women that I picked up on the internet.
(Princess flashing back to the day her stepmom discovered the angel tattoo on her back and asked "That's a woman! Is there something you have to tell us?")
P's sm: And how did you....find these women?
(Princess looks around and notices everyone except for her saint of a father looking very interested)
P: *sigh* Do you know what a blog is?
P's sm: Yes.
P: (in head "really?!") Ok well I have one.
P: And you leave comments on other peoples' blogs and they leave comments, and you talk and...whatever I'm meeting them on Sunday, kay?
Ya know - unless you blog, or read them on a regular basis, there's just no way to explain a blog-meet to people without it sounding either a) stupid or b) dangerous/foolish. Thankfully my family don't seem too interested in the whole thing other than teasing me a bit. I don't know whether to be hurt or relieved that they also don't seem to have much interest in reading the blog. Don't they know how important I am
not on the internetz?!
Posted by Princess of the Universe at 12:32 pm
Thursday, April 09, 2009
I occasionally wonder if my life is frivolous.
Take this blog for example. I'm going away for a week, and suddenly I worry whether I should schedule guest posters, or if anyone really cares if I'm away for 8 days, and if it will effect my stats...
Or the fact that tonight, the night before Good Friday, I'm sitting on my couch watching Bones, eating M & M's (new pastel Easter colours!) and hoping that Supernatural is a new episode.
Or the fact that I waste money on things like necklaces and pretty gift wrap and ribbons.
OK, so I'm 34 in 3 days - unmarried without children. (No, this isn't going to be a post whining about my single life again...) It seems that motherhood brings meaning to one's life and makes your activities more noble somehow. You're caring for another person- raising them up into a tolerable human being.
So at my age, what am I doing that's noble and meaningful?
The question is, should I be doing more? My job is decent. I mean I support people who are doing really important work. And as much as I joke that students drive me crazy, it actually makes me kind of proud to help them out and see them do well in their research.
However, my job is 9-5. What else do I do? Even my volunteering is kind of elitist- for the Alumni Association of my University. Is that really something to be admired?
I just wonder sometimes if people who have families don't kind of look down on me for my life. Like I should be doing something better with my spare time other than blogging and watching TV and having lunch with my girlfriends when I can drag them away from their kids.
I mean aren't we kind of obligated as human beings to try and do something to make this world a better place? I live in a privileged society. I have a good job, my own home, and can afford to buy myself the odd pretty thing.
There are so many other people in the world who just don't have the ability to do something like volunteer for an Alumni Association. That is so far beyond their realm of concern that it's practically laughable.
So really, I guess the answer is obvious right? If I feel that I'm frivolous, then maybe I am. Maybe I should be doing something a bit more fulfilling and worthwhile. I just have no idea what. I don't know that I'm the soup kitchen or homeless shelter type. I think I'm more of the planning a fundraising gala type.
What do YOU do?
(And oh yeah - anyone wanna guest post for me when I'm away? April 16th - 24th - kthanx)
Posted by Princess of the Universe at 7:29 pm
Monday, April 06, 2009
So I’m gonna totally steal a quote from Anne of Green Gables here and say that "I like people who make me like them. Saves me so much trouble forcing myself to like them."
I fell quite deeply into a re-crush yesterday. This was someone that I had already been in crush with not so long ago, but due to various life circumstances, we hadn’t seen each other in a while so I forgot how absolutely fabulous they are.
It’s one of those people that you go months without seeing, but the second you do see them? You find yourself telling them everything about everything in your life, because you so desperately want them to know you.
One of those people that is so absolutely beautiful that you enjoy just looking at them for the pure innocent aesthetic joy of it.
One of those people that is hilarious and tough, yet sweet and vulnerable. You want to take care of them, and at the same time, don’t secretly resent them because they’re actually needy. (Cause they’re not).
As mentioned in the quote above, this person makes me like them. Everytime we’re together I feel this deep sense of satisfaction that someone like that exists in the world, and I get to share in a tiny part of their being. I have the privilege of occasionally getting a share of their time.
Who is this shining specimen of fabulousness? None other than my darling Ali from Idiosyncrasies of a Gemini Mind. Do you read her? Well why not?
She’s one of those people who seem to get me. I don’t have to use a dozen words to explain what I mean when two or three will do.
And so? I am back in girl-crush. If I ever really left. I hope she doesn’t mind…
Friday, April 03, 2009
So apparently I'm a snob.
No, no one has been rude enough to say this to my face, it's more of a realization that I've had about myself off and on throughout my life.
The latest example? A couple of weeks ago a friend came into town and we met at a bookstore/café. It seemed like a reasonable thing to pick up some books while I was there.
Now the other week I was going through various lists of books on teh internetz. Apparently there isn't one "Top 100 Books You Should Read Before You Die." It seems that people have varying opinions on the matter. I even found a "Top 1000" books list in chronological order (based on original publication date).
Anyhow, one day when I'm needing a mental break, I figure I'll break out all those lists, and compile one of my own from all the suggestions. Of course I'll probably populate it with books I've already read to give myself some sense of accomplishment.
Anyhow, back to my snobbishness. On one of those lists, it mentioned "The Watchmen" as something I must read. Having just seen the movie, and being a firm believer in reading the book after seeing the movie, I thought it seemed like a good idea while it was still fresh in my mind.
So I went to the bookstore. Huh. $22.00. For a comic? Seriously?
OK, clearly comics have come a long way since I was reading Archie back when I was 10. Weren't they like 50 cents?
But still, I really did want to read it. So the day I was at the bookstore with my friend, I picked it up again. I was now prepared for the cost and ready to commit.
Then I put it down.
And picked it up.
And put it down.
I couldn't do it.
I buy Jane Austen. I took Shakespeare in University. I studied Chaucer.
Uh huh. When's the last time I picked up the Canterbury Tales for fun? Yes, I do read Jane all the time, but what else do I have on my shelf? The Shopaholic Books, the Bridget Jones books, Anne Rice, Dean Koontz...
Clearly I wasn't going to be writing in any literary journals anytime soon.
So I came up with a plan. I ran to the "literature" section. I scanned through all the authors until I found one I recognized from my many Top 100 lists. Ian McEwan. Atonement. Hey- that was a good movie. Mmmm James McAvoy...
With my non-embarassing book in hand, I then grabbed The Watchmen and proudly marched to the cashier. None of the literary geniuses behind the counter could make fun of me now. Clearly Atonement was for me, and the comic was for like a nephew or something, right? (Right?!)
"Ok, that'll be $50.00."
So apparently I bought the most expensive bloody books in the store that day.
Not wanting to look like an idiot while simultaneously confessing that The Watchmen was the one I really wanted, I swallowed hard and paid for both.
And am now happily in the midst of two fabulous novels. Atonement? Is awesome. I love it. I want to pick up everything he's written now.
And the Watchmen? Well, duh it's pretty cool too. It makes you think, while being fun and disturbing and interesting all at once. And it has pretty pictures to boot.
I think I'll pick up V for Vendetta next.