This May Be TMI for Some of You...

So this past Saturday? I got threaded.

(You know what makes me mad? The fact that I have to do that- I mean women are supposed to be all smooth and silky, so why? For the love of Goddess, why?)

Ahem. Anyhow, I got threaded for the first time. Cause I'm a delicate flower, and apparently waxing just causes me to break out in pink rashy puffed up itchiness. Annoying.

So I got a coupon for a free threading. Awesome. No product= no pink rashy puffed up itchiness right?

So off I go. My eyebrows were ready. My wallet was doing a little dance because I was getting this for free. Bring it on!

So first of all? It hurts. Like a lot. Not even like a lot. Just really - it hurts a LOT. I mean waxing, that's not fun, but it's brief. So in like a millisecond it's over. Threading? Not to much. But whatev. After the initial shock I'm all "I am Princess, hear me roar! I can totally do this."

Then? There's apparently audience participation required. The woman has the bloody thread in her teeth and is using her hands to tear out each little individual hair at a time, and is clearly positioning the thread very specifically so as to maximize the pain. But I still have to stretch out the skin above and below the eyebrow. Fine lady. I'll help you cause me more excruciating pain. (Did I mention that it hurts? Yeah. It does.)

Next? When it's all over? "You want upper lip done too?"
Le sigh. Clearly since she's asking, it needs to be done right? "Yeah OK" (I mean why not, it's been super fun so far, right?)

More audience participation! I have to shove my tongue up below the lip so as to stretch out the skin again. She would occasionally tap a place, and apparently that was her not-so-subtle way of letting me know where the pain was coming next. (Oh yeah, and where my tongue should be) (Resisting urge to make predictably dirty tongue joke here).

And THEN? She keeps going...lower lip (wha?) chin...(seriously?)

"Next time, you schedule whole face."

*blink blink"

"OK" (as I try hard not to burst into tears, and suddenly have visions of photos of me posted around the city under the heading "See Princess, the Dog-faced Girl!")

I go out into the main area, and the owner asks me how it all went. "It hurt!" She sighs softly and agrees that it does.
"And apparently I need to do the whole face next time!"
By this time, I've recovered my sense of humour and am totally writing this post in my head.

"Did she do more than just your brows?"
"Uh yes, apparently I needed it. Whole face!"

She sighed softly again and told me how she's had talks with her about how it's not necessary to upsell, but the woman sees hair and just needs to remove it...
And then told me that the same thing happened in the interview - it was more of an audition with the woman waxing her. She told me that she had tears streaming down her face as the woman insisted in doing her lip too and how much it hurt.

First of all? Wimp. I didn't cry (on the outside anyways).
And second? Wow, I hope she didn't have too many people to interview that week. Cause the face is actually less painful than some other places...

But actually? I still think I kind of liked the little masochist. I didn't have any pink rashy puffed up itchiness afterwards. And at least she's gonna be honest with you.

Yeah, I'll be going back.