Apparently Bon Jovi is Coming to Winnipeg Too...

So apparently when I only write a post every week or two, you get a bunch of "this is my life right now" kinda posts. Aren't you all delighted?

Apparently you also get a post with not one, but two photos of me in a tank top and sweats/yoga pants. Kinda makes it all worthwhile doesn't it?


These two photos are a progress report on the weight loss update. So far I am at 31 pounds down. That pile of clothes? All the clothes that I can no longer wear because they are now too big. Like falling off me too big. I love clothes shopping, but I will be really happy once I settle on a size and stay put for a while. So, I now look like this (with a less flashy face normally). Not too bad. According to the WW site, I have 34 pounds to go before I'm at the top level of my healthy weight range. We'll see how it goes. I should be there by March or April.

(Please note how beautifully made my bed is...not).

This photo? Is the scarf that I just spent entirely too much money on this past weekend. But isn't it pretty? I don't even want to tell you what it cost. It's actually embarrassing. I mean it's a scarf.
In other news, I am going to Halifax next week for work. Anyone ever been? Any place I should see? Do I have any readers in Halifax who wanna meet?





Ok, love you all.
And just to tantalize you - I have an exciting co-post coming up sometime soon with Ali where we show off our artsy side! Stay tuned!

xo

Voca!

Is this another thing that I'm the last one to know about??
(Anyone else get the sense that they were inspired by the Blue Man Group? Um, except how the Blue Men don't talk and all. I kinda mean the quirkiness and the "look")

I Need Advice From the Internet

So I have to make a decision this weekend, and I don't really know what to do about it.
This is of course where YOU come in.

The scenario:
I have been friends with D2 since Fall 2001. We went out on one actual date, and did have sex a couple of times over the years, but on the whole: just friends.

The thing is, I have a few fundamental problems with our relationship:
1. I get the sense that he only wants me as a friend on his terms. He wants me to be agreeable to anything he wants to do and not try to sway him.

E.g. In Minneapolis:
D2: We should go to the IHOP for breakfast tomorrow.
Princess: What about Denny's? They have "Moons over my Hammy" I miss that since Denny's left Winnipeg.
D2: We should go to the IHOP.
Princess: What if I don't want to go to IHOP?
D2: Then we have a problem.

2. Whenever he has a girlfriend he both a) vanishes so I only see/hear from him every few months and b) lies to the girlfriend when he does happen to spend time with me.

Let me say this: I am not dumb. I understand that being friends with someone of the opposite sex can occasionally be complicated. Maybe your significant other is the jealous or insecure type. You don't want to totally write them off for this, maybe you want to be sensitive?

However, in 8 years there have been 3 or 4 significant girlfriends and I've never met one of them. I don't even know if they realize that I exist. I guess I won't be invited to the wedding. Cause wouldn't you (the bride) wonder why this other girl is so important to invite if you've never even heard of, or met her in the past x years?

So I haven't seen D2 since March. You see he was in a play and he met a girl. So April & May involved rehearsals, and the rest of the time involved him having a girlfriend.

He is now calling and emailing a lot. He has decreed that we shall get together on Saturday - breakfast, afternoon, evening - whenever works for me.

A couple of months ago I thought about writing him off altogether. 8 years of being his placeholder girl who gets ditched the second a real girl comes along is enough.

But should people really be that expendable?
I mean he is fun and sweet to hang out with. It's not like he's my bff. Why can't I just be acquaintances with him?

This seems the obvious solution: downgrade the friendship to acquaintances. We get together a couple times per year, and that's that.

My dilemma? (This is where YOU come in)
Do I announce such a demotion to him? Discuss my hurt, resignation and ultimate decision?
Most of the time when friends drift, this is kind of a natural occurrence, but that isn't the case here. I suspect he's single again and wants to start hanging out.

I really hate melodrama.
I don't want to get into a big discussion with him about how I've been treated and how it made me feel yadda yadda. It's silly. And girlish.
I've gotten angry with him in the past - especially about the crap like the IHOP situation when we're on holiday together. That's easy: WE set the agenda - not YOU.

But this? I'm just not sure how to handle it with the least amount of girly emotion possible.

Thoughts?

You Are SO Lime Green Jello of Me

I remember when I was new to blogging and I proudly sheepishly proclaimed that the only thing that prevented me from posting everyday, or even multiple times per day was the fact that I didn't want to look like a loser with no life.

I still kinda feel like a loser with no life - but apparently now I'm not afraid to let y'all see it.
Let's not call this a slack *ss bullet post - let's call this.. catching everyone up on what's been going on with me in a very succinct way, shall we?

- I gained 2 pounds last Monday, but made up for it by losing 5 when I weighed in yesterday. (Net loss = 3 for those of you not so big with the math). That makes for a total of 28 pounds since July 2. Go me.

- Remember blind date guy? I never did tell any of you how it all went. So without revealing too many details - I met him, and I reallyreallyreally wanted to make it work. He was trying SO hard. And I really didn't want the fact that he had an awful mustache influence me, cause hello? Shallow? But then he wouldn't tell me his last name. After we'd already met once. Which of course led to my co-workers googling him, and finding out for me. So yeah, between his paranoia, goofiness, and mustache I realized that I just wasn't into it. Ugh.

- I am considering applying to a Master's program. This is terrifying. I mean as if any of my undergrad professors remember me at all. I contacted one of them for a reference letter and he said yes - but am at a total loss about what to do for the second reference letter. Even if I had gotten along with my honours thesis advisor (which I really didn't), he's passed away - so he's not an option. And writing? What writing do I do other than work emails and my blog? Should I send them a link to both blogs? My erotic writing is pretty hot and all - but not sure I really want to use that as an application piece. Ugh.

- I am considering therapy again. It annoys me. I have gone this route twice before. Isn't it enough already? But I'm just so angry all the time. And hurt. And occasionally burrowing. I probably need it - but it's just so frustrating. Why am I broken? Why do other people get through life just fine, yet I need to find a couch to sit and yip about all my crap on? I'm not ashamed of therapy - I'm a Psych grad and all - but I do find it annoying.

- Movies I have seen lately (and I don't feel like linking them all): Zomebieland, Whip It, Jennifer's Body, I Love You Beth Cooper, My Life in Ruins, (Second run theatres are awesome). Oddly, my favourite of them all? Jennifer's Body. Bizarre. But the writing is so hilarious...and it has Seth from the OC!



-My washing machine stopped spinning yesterday. I had dripping clothes all over the place. That spin cycle? REALLY important. Totally prevents you from having to wring out your clothes, and tossing them around the dryer for 10 hours straight. It took 3 1/2 hours for the clothes to dry, and 5 hours for my comforter. Fun.

- I blatantly stole that "Does Winnipeg Really Exist" clip on my sidebar from PsychGrad. Check it out- it's awesome!

- I hit "mark all as read" yesterday. I'm sorry. I love you. I'll try to do better. I was WEEKS behind. I couldn't help it.

xo

Burrow.

So I burrowed.
And I cried.
And I wondered if I was an inherently damaged person.

Why do I do better alone?
What is my problem?

My friends called/commented/texted/emailed.

Some offered their couches.
Some threatened me that I couldn't get rid of them no matter how reclusive I became.
Some told me that it was fine if I needed alone time.
Some asked to know what it was that they said that hurt me.

So I poked my head out and forced myself to live.
I called back.
I returned texts.
I responded to emails.

Am I OK now?
Not really.

But will burrowing help?
No.

I'm still hurt.
I'm still confused by why I react the way I do to things.
I would still prefer to hide on my couch ignoring all forms of communication.

I haven't attempted to twitter again.
This blog post kinda sucks.

But as much as I might like to avoid people - I think that's the sort of behaviour that turns you into the crazy lady that wanders the street in a bathrobe followed by stray cats. The lady with the house that the children avoid on Halloween because somehow the rumour got started that if you get too close, you might get snatched up inside, never to be heard from again.

I think I have the potential to become that lady. Not actually kidnapping children of course- cause once I had them, what would I do with them? But the bathrobe in the street lady? Yeah.

So I un-burrowed. Because my people? They give me humanity. They force me to laugh and look at myself in different ways - both bad AND good.