Thursday, June 18, 2009

Clearly I Shouldn't Run for Public Office

I had to speak in public at Alumni events twice in less than a week.
And I? Did not do well.

One speech was mediocre.
The other was less so. (And by "less so" I don't mean it was "better.")

And that whole mantra about picturing your audience in their underwear/naked/dead?
1. By the time I am frozen in panic with everyone staring at me, THAT idea is completely gone from my terrified little head.
2. Does that really work anyhow?

I just don't get how people can do the whole speaking in front of people thing. And I don't necessarily even mean at something like a big event. I mean jobs like being a teacher, or any kind of instructor-type person. Impossible.

One of the guys who also had to do a speech at this event had no clue what to say, and since I have a baby crush on him, I offered to write something for him. He took what I wrote - condensed it down to key words and delivered a kick-ass, completely natural-sounding and hilarious speech.

He's a lawyer.

And I'm too angry and resentful and jealous of his accomplishment to have a crush on him anymore.

I can guarantee though, that when it comes to performance review time - I bet it will be one of the things that my boss tells me to work on. Urgh. Does anyone else do Toastmasters other than old men?

Any suggestions?


Rachel said...

here's the thing I love public speaking. I took so many classes that it's no big deal to me
I talk to ONE person - I focus on one person in the audience and to keep eye contact I go back to that person. It helps me (and I shake like a leaf when I am giving speeches - seriously - my knees knock)

cmacc said...

I too, hate it. I only feel comfortable with the idea of it when I 100% know my topic. And even then I ALWAYS think there is someone in the room who will know more and make me look stupid. I used to teach courses and worried SO MUCH about what I was teaching them but then I realized THEY paid to come and listen to ME. So I was probably the most knowledgeable on the topic. Just realize that they chose YOU to speak so clearly you are qualified to do so. Its the only way I feel confident, maybe it'll help you too to remember that. ??

Bandade said...

Let me just say that I would not pick any job that I had to speak in public.

I will help you in anyway I can though. I could be in your pretend audiance and pick my nose.

MonsteRawr said...

I got nothin', darlin'. I'm fine with public speaking as long as I don't have to read something specific, meaning I can make the whole thing up on the fly. I find I'm more relaxed and natural when I can just let the words come.

WendyB said...

I hate public speaking and I'm just terrible at it. I empathize!

Anonymous said...

I think it takes a special kind of person who can face the public and give a speech. I on the other hand like most normal people run in the opposite direction.

thank gawd I havent had to do that since high school.

Chief Rock Chef said...

Sometimes I am really good, sometimes I totally suck. For me it all seems to hinge on getting out the first sentence on one piece...

Random Musings Of My Life said...

Where hav eyou been??

You went private and I was not invited so I deleted you... did you not get my email?


Glad to see you are not private anymore

Nat said...

I am getting better at it. So here's the deal with me, if you get me in a meeting setting on at a conference, I'll happily get up and ask a question or partake in discussion. Get me in front of a group and I freeze. I am getting better at it though... fundamentally I keep telling myself that no one in the room wants me to fail. If they are all with me, it's much much better.

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