Thursday, April 09, 2009


I occasionally wonder if my life is frivolous.

Take this blog for example. I'm going away for a week, and suddenly I worry whether I should schedule guest posters, or if anyone really cares if I'm away for 8 days, and if it will effect my stats...

Or the fact that tonight, the night before Good Friday, I'm sitting on my couch watching Bones, eating M & M's (new pastel Easter colours!) and hoping that Supernatural is a new episode.

Or the fact that I waste money on things like necklaces and pretty gift wrap and ribbons.

OK, so I'm 34 in 3 days - unmarried without children. (No, this isn't going to be a post whining about my single life again...) It seems that motherhood brings meaning to one's life and makes your activities more noble somehow. You're caring for another person- raising them up into a tolerable human being.

So at my age, what am I doing that's noble and meaningful?

The question is, should I be doing more? My job is decent. I mean I support people who are doing really important work. And as much as I joke that students drive me crazy, it actually makes me kind of proud to help them out and see them do well in their research.

However, my job is 9-5. What else do I do? Even my volunteering is kind of elitist- for the Alumni Association of my University. Is that really something to be admired?

I just wonder sometimes if people who have families don't kind of look down on me for my life. Like I should be doing something better with my spare time other than blogging and watching TV and having lunch with my girlfriends when I can drag them away from their kids.

I mean aren't we kind of obligated as human beings to try and do something to make this world a better place? I live in a privileged society. I have a good job, my own home, and can afford to buy myself the odd pretty thing.

There are so many other people in the world who just don't have the ability to do something like volunteer for an Alumni Association. That is so far beyond their realm of concern that it's practically laughable.

So really, I guess the answer is obvious right? If I feel that I'm frivolous, then maybe I am. Maybe I should be doing something a bit more fulfilling and worthwhile. I just have no idea what. I don't know that I'm the soup kitchen or homeless shelter type. I think I'm more of the planning a fundraising gala type.

What do YOU do?

(And oh yeah - anyone wanna guest post for me when I'm away? April 16th - 24th - kthanx)



Nat said...

No new Supernatural until April 23. I'll be Gettysburg. Alas.

Nat said...

Sorry... post too soon.

As for kids, I don't think of less of the folks I know who don't have kids. It's just the way it is. The key is to be who you are, and try to leave this messy world a slightly better place than you found it in.

(And if you really want guest a post I'm happy to do it. Just email me or drop me a line on my blog.)

Faiqa said...

If it makes you feel any better, I'm 34 with a kid and another on the way and some days I ask myself if my life isn't frivolous, too. Then, I realize just because I'm not building schools in Africa doesn't mean that what I'm doing doesn't matter. I'm sure you make a difference. Somebody in this world is better off because you are here. It's statistically impossible for that not to be true. (I know you love how I brought the math in there).

And guest post??! Heeelll yeah!!

Jen said...

That would be really weird (and mean) to think less of a person(s) for not having a child. Be happy. Be good. Be kind. That is what matters. I think you encompass those traits and more. Volunteering is personal and to even do it no matter what capacity is still fantastic of you. It's giving of yourself and your skills that matter not "what" charity.

You're a good person, Princess. With or without children. Don't doubt that. Ever.

[Me? Well, you know that I raise funds and run in the name of Leukemia & Lymphoma society.]

Greg said...

M&M's just taste better when they're special colors, don't they?

Be careful and have fun while you're away.

Sincerely, Greg, representing the lurkers.

Princess of the Universe said...

Nat- crap, I'm in Florida on the 23rd! I wonder if I can watch TV in my room that night. (Haven't quite mastered recording devices yet)
And I WILL be emailing...

Faiqa- I want to see actual numbers and formulas! And thank you- I'm totally taking you up on that!

Jen- this children thing seems to be coming up a lot lately doesn't it? I think this uterus thing is really starting to freak me out!

Greg- thanks for de-lurking!! xo

Jaymie said...

The people with kids are looking at your life with complete and utter jealousy! and I think Nat's right, it's just the way it is, and people who know you won't be looking down and judging.

Backpacker momma said...

You're not frivolous. You're living the life intended for you and whatever that ends up being, it is what it is, kids or no kids, spouse or no spouse, volunteer hours or no volunteer hours. Its who you are, its what makes you you and its why we love ya. No changes required.

Ali said...

Is it your birthday today? Or was it yesterday? No, it's today, isn't it?

Eeeek! I'm being dumb!

Whatever, Happy Birthday Princess!!!!! Love you, hope you have/had an amazing day!

No, it's today, right? Right?

Princess of the Universe said...

Jaymie- oh I doubt they're jealous, possibly occasionally wistful...

BPM- awww, thanks honey!

Ali- contrary to that little widget on my sidebar that seems to have skipped a day, it's actually tomorrow- the 12th. But thanks!! xoxo

Psychgrad said...

I just wonder sometimes if people who have families don't kind of look down on me for my life

I think you answered your own question. It's not important what other people think - it's important that you be happy with/satisfied by your own life.

I'd like to do some volunteering too. I'm thinking about something like becoming a "buddy" with a newcomer to Canada. I used to do some of that stuff at Continuing Ed., but haven't done much volunteering for about 5 years now.

Happy early birthday! Enjoy your trip!!!

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