Tuesday, August 12, 2008

Nobody Doesn't Like Sara Lee...

I don't cook. Most nights I eat Kraft Dinner or a sandwich for supper.
I do make the occasional curry, but on the whole dinner is a pretty simple affair.

But I bake. I'll see photo of something and decide to invent it. Yup- I'm Betty Crocker.

So naturally My Dear Anon requests me to assist when she decides to repay her neighbours for constantly giving her free berries and such.

They gave her blueberries this past weekend. I whole-heartedly support her turning them into muffins and sending them back to the neighbours. I'm not a fan of the blueberry. Not muffins or pancakes. Not pie. Not alone. Not juice. At most I will let them sit in a bowl and I'll acknowledge that they're pretty. Other than that? Evil.

So fine. We go and buy supplies. Then we realized we forgot the muffin cup liners. Out we go again to get those. OK! We're all set.

Muffins first. My Dear Anon reads the recipe and I stir. MDA doesn't like my stirring. Seems to think everything should be blended. Anal.

So the muffins bake and we then move on to the oatmeal cookies she's decided she wants to give to her family. OK!

I read the recipe and she stirs. I show her the art of not measuring and just tossing things in. It's more creative that way. Makes you feel more chef-like. She gets all cranky when I ignore the whole "dry ingredients should be mixed separately from wet ingredients" thing. Uptight.

Then she decides she wants some cookies for herself without raisins. What's that about?

So I pick out the raisins from a few of the cookies, then decide that some raisins would be good for her and stop trying.

So we bake. And watch the Olympics.

20 minutes later she tries a cookie. And makes a face. WTF?! Hello - I just helped you create art! Don'tyoumakethatface!!

I tried a bite. Oh yeah that sucks. What kind of crappy recipe did you use? Let me see that.
Uh MDA? Did we remember to put in sugar? Oh - uh, did I forget to tell you to put in sugar?


So I owe My Dear Anon and her family some cookies.

And I haven't heard the end of it on facebook ever since. Every day she has a new status. "...is craving cookies." "...likes sugar. Especially in cookies." Yadda yadda.

Don't know why I'm friends with her anyhow.



Jen said...

Sugar is SO overrated!

All Mod Cons said...

Can't you just stick the sugar to the outside?

Glamourpuss said...

You could always use them as crackers!

But I think we've all stuffed up a recipe - I'm like you, just bung it all in and hope it tastes okay...


Anonymous said...

Really, I say drop her and make me your new best friend. I'll appreciate all your baking :)

Princess in Galoshes said...

HEE! That's so funny! And I actually had something similar happen to me a couple years ago. A friend and I were making cookies from scratch and we forgot THE FLOUR. Do you know what cookies become when they are not made with flour? They become crusty puddles! Sad day.

Princess of the Universe said...

Jen- I know!! (yeah, I don't believe us either)

AMC- probably not after they're baked. ;( Good idea though!

Puss- I think they're only good for drowning in chocolate milk now.

Suzel- Done.

Princess- Really? Hmm - sounds like a fun experiment. And not wasteful at all. :P

Jodi said...

It's always been my job to make pumpkin pie for thanksgiving. one year I forgot the sugar. Tasted like paste. I was extremely disappointed as the other pie I traditionally make is pecan, which I hate. I look forward to pumpkin pie more than anyone.

PinkPiddyPaws said...

hee.hee.. better to have forgotten the sugar than to have used salt instead. Me? I like those tubes of pre-done dough that I can cook and claim I "baked" them. :)

Anonymous said...

I laughed so hard that I think I peed myself....

You should just tell you readers that I read, and follow directions better then you!!!!!

I cant believe how sympathetic your readers are, so silly...

Sorry guys she cant drop me as a friend, Im around for comic relief!!!

Where are the new cookies???? Still want some, or cheesecake.. Mmmmm cheescake

the princess said...

oh noooo! you definately needed the sugar. she threw you off with her anal behavior! sounds like a lot of fun though

Anonymous said...

I really really really want cookies. However, my tummy really really really doesn't ;).

Princess of the Universe said...

Jodi- you're more generous than I- I don't believe in making things I hate. :P

PPP- whenever I buy the pre-made dough I just end up eating it raw. :)

Anon- yeah yeah- I'll get you your cookies- I bought the oatmeal yesterday :P

Princess- and she took it like a champ- I was more humiliated than anything!

Hilly- I'm getting concerned about your poor tummy...

Princess Pointful said...

I'm just in awe that you don't love blueberries!

phishez said...

You cook like I do. Except I have to taste everything before it gets baked.

That's half the fun and most of the reason I don't bake any more :(

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